Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
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