so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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