And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize
