Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
