Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
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