To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Randomize
