This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I want to make a zoo with you.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
