Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Randomize
