She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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