Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
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