I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Randomize
