First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
What changed your mind?
Being sober
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize