One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
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