Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
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