I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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