just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Its about making memories worth repressing
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
