I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
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