she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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