any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
I'm just crazy horny about you
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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