why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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