My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Randomize
