After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
My Sexting was not on an AP level
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Randomize
