Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Randomize
