I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Randomize
