Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Randomize
