Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
