Me. At least after what I've been through.
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Randomize
