Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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