This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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