so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
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