yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Randomize
