I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
