That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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