It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
