There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize
