Who did Billy Mays play for?
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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