Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
she pinky promised me she was 18
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
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