The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Randomize
