No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
