is this the sara with the beer cane?
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Randomize
