Pappa wants mamma naked
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
please don't ironically join a cult
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