ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
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