but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Randomize
