i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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