Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize