Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
He felt like a one man threesome
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
