i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
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