Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
His hands were made for my vagina.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
Did you pee in the oven last night??
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
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