Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize