in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I cut my penus on the lid.
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
