Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
I don't deserve a penis
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
